So let me guess, you are a person of honor at your best friend’s wedding or a parent of the wedding couple. They just asked you to give a speech during the reception. You said yes, but now you are secretly wishing that you hadn’t, because you have absolutely no idea where to even start.
I completely understand. Speaking in front of a crowd is terrifying and there’s a lot of pressure that comes with it. Especially when your words are supposed to be emotional. You are in luck though because me and my professional wedding vendors friends are here to help!
In this blog post, find 5 of my favorite tips for writing a wedding speech that will tug at everyones heart strings. Keep reading to find out what they are!
What Is A Wedding Speech?
Firstly, what is a wedding speech anyway? In most places, this is widely known as a tradition where a person of honor says a few words about one of the newlyweds during the reception or at dinner.
Normally, the maid of honor says a few words about the bride, and the best man does the same for the groom. Though couples who choose to have an untraditional wedding, or are LGBTQ+, will simply ask someone important to them regardless of sex or gender.
Whether the wedding you will be writing the speech for is traditional or not, you will absolutely rock it as long as you follow these next 5 tips!
Do Your Research
First things first, you have to do some research. Start by taking a piece of paper and create a mindmap style collection of information and thoughts. Ask yourself the following questions;
Who are you and what is your role in this wedding? How do you know the wedding couple? What are some of your favorite memories with them (as a couple and individually)? What is your most important piece of advice or wish for their marriage? How do you intend to support them as a married couple in the future?
If you invest some time to come up with answers to these questions, and if you speak from the heart, you’ll have done about 80% of the actual work! This will also help you overcome some of the writer’s block.
Streamline Your Thoughts
It always helps to follow a red thread when writing a speech (and anything else for that matter). I mean, a chronological order of anecdotes just makes a lot of sense!
Start by introducing yourself and dive into the first part of your story. How do you know the couple?
Are you childhood friends? Did you grow up together and attend the same schools? Did your job bring you together?
This is the time to relive all of the precious memories you’ve made together. Then, talk about the present.
What does your relationship with the couple look like today? What about the couple’s relationship? How has it changed them for the better?
Once you’ve talked a bit about the present, finish your speech with a glimpse into their future. What are your hopes and wishes for them and their marriage?
Streamlining your thoughts will help you to organize them so that on the big day, your story is not all over the place.
Do’s And Don’ts of Writing A Wedding Speech
When writing up your wedding speech, there are a few rules that should be kept in mind. These do’s and don’ts will help you to not only be respectful of the couple’s boundaries, they will also help you differentiate between what is appropriate to share, and what isn’t. Keep reading to learn more.
Stay Away From Inside Jokes
Speak about your personal experiences with the couple, but don’t tell inside jokes that no one else can follow. Talk about things that other people will be able to understand.
It’s alright to tell stories about some of the fun times you had when you were younger, but make sure that you aren’t sharing more information than you need to. It’s probably not a good idea that the mother of the bride hears about that one time that you were in Napa and her little girl fell off a bar wearing nothing but a string bikini. Not every story is appropriate.
Don’t Overdue The Comedy
The best speeches are able to find a balance between humor and emotion. Make people laugh, but be careful not to turn the entire speech into one big comedy show.
Keep It Short
Your speech doesn’t have to be the next Tolkein, it’s okay to keep it on the short and sweet side. People start to get bored after a while, so I suggest that you make your speech no longer than 5 minutes.
Speak From The Heart
When giving your speech, don’t be afraid to speak from your heart. This is a day where love is being celebrated. You can never go wrong by sharing your true feelings so don’t be afraid to let the couple know just how much you love them and what your wishes for them are.
By following these do’s and don’ts, you will have a perfect wedding speech in no time!
Once you have written up your speech, give yourself some time to learn how to actually present it. On the day of the actual wedding day, you might be a little nervous, but taking the time to practice your speech beforehand will help you to be a lot more prepared when it’s time to make your wedding toast.
Try practicing in front of a mirror or read it to your cat! Make note of where you want to add any dramatic pauses, or special intonations, so that your speech is not flat.
You don’t have to know it by heart, just read it out loud a couple of times to familiarize yourself with your own text. Having a glass of bubbly often helps to calm your nerves a bit, just be sure that you don’t overdo it!
Have Fun With Your Wedding Speech
Lastly and most importantly, don’t forget to have as much fun as possible when writing and giving your speech! Witnessing your best friend or sibling get married to the love of their life and celebrating this momentous occasion with everyone who is dear to them, is a once in a lifetime experience.
So have a good time with it! It is a great honor to be chosen to speak about someone and share your special memories at their wedding. It means that they really trust and value your relationship.
Let me assure you that you got this! These are your people and you are theirs – otherwise you wouldn’t even consider doing a wedding speech for them.
Remember, speak from the heart and talk about what you know, like your love and appreciation for them. Follow these 5 wedding speech tips and everything will be okay. YOU GOT THIS!
Did you enjoy this blog post? You can check out more wedding tips here.
These 5 tips were personally drawn up and written by the incredible Simone Gori from lovely words.
She’s a professional Wedding Celebrant who not only officiates your wedding ceremony with her witty and loving manner but also helps others to write and officiate wedding ceremonies.
Find out more about Simone and also her coaching program.
Hi there friends, I’m Max.
I’m an International Wedding, People, and Lifestyle Photographer based out of Switzerland and South Africa – available for worldwide travel.
Me and my art are a package of a celebration of life, silly dance moves, and stupid jokes (dark humor included).
My photography is a celebration of life, raw emotions, pure happiness, and love—the focus: on you and all the small and big moments.
Part of me and my services is being a part of my client’s journey and everything leading up to their big celebration. I love to openly share some of that experience and knowledge to help you get to your kick-ass event of celebration!
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